Relationships in the classroom: high fives and handshakes. The two sides of the coin.

Last Monday, I had the privilege to participate in a discussion about relationships in the classroom for TTradio.org hosted by Tom Rogers and Dean Boddington. The discussion took place around a viral reel of a headteacher high fiving kids in corridors in a primary school setting, I believe, which was very much praised on social media. 

The debate centred on the fact that building relationships in the classroom by teachers was much harder than just to display "one to one" banter in the corridor.  The debate opened a full discussion on the role of relationships in the classroom and it got me thinking about how teachers develop these vital relationships, in particular, in a secondary school setting. 

Is it wrong to high five children in corridors?

Definitely, not! It is a sign of having a good rapport with students. I do it sometimes! However, there's a danger to think that relationships can be reduced to high fiving students, one by one in the corridor, especially for new teachers or non teachers at home. High fiving may be perceived as a sign of a good relationship, which, in turn happens as a result of a strong "teaching and learning" procedure, matched with great "behaviour management strategies". A skilful status quo which is difficult to achieve in every classroom, regardless of the subject, and which can only be truly reached by a whole school consistency approach to behaviour management and teaching and learning approach.

The two sides of the coin: building up relationships

In other words, shaking hands and high fiving students in the corridor, in my opinion, is the result of what is going on in the classroom, in every single classroom of a school:

• The setting of high expectations in all students: anchoring in challenge and a believe that all our students can achieve great things. We must communicate these expectations with our students and when they raise to the challenge, we must use our school reward system to acknowledge the effort, so that we build safe environments, where students are willing to take risks and push themselves. 

• The above should take place, in tandem, with a strong and fair behaviour management policy. Yes, I will be positive, yes, I will praise you when you do well BUT if you make the wrong choice, there will be consequences, in a fair and safe environment. Students should be clear about what this entails and it should be consistent across the whole school. At PRS, we use the "warn, move, remove" strategy. Using a firm voice to address a non-desired behaviour in our students and the consequence if these persist, is essential. "Jonny, the expectation is that when the teacher talks students should be quiet. Make the right choice, this is just a warning, if you continue talking you will need to be moved. It is your choice" and move on with the lesson, to allow little Jonny to reflect on what you said and allow him to rectify his behaviour. If this does not happen, then little Jonny will be moved or removed. 

• The two points above will not work UNLESS we have a strong teaching and learning strategy in our lessons. In other words, we must plan and deliver well planned lessons, where scaffold of activities take place, where we constantly check for understanding, make students accountable for their learning by making them think hard at all times through skilful, scaffolded tasks. We must do this in a safe environment, smiling, rewarding good choices by students, using cold calling, so everyone can be accountable for. When this takes place, students will feel they are making progress, which will result in them learning and acknowledging they are doing so! So they willl start collaborating with us.  I wrote a blogpost on how to adapt questioning in the MFL classroom to achieve this, which can be found here. 

• When these three conditions take place, students will feel positive about themselves, about our subject. We, teachers, will respond positively to their responses and as a consequence we start developing positive relationships. This happens by the way we reward the students with a smile or a "well done, that was a great answer" or an Achievement Point or Merit. Students will start feeling good about themselves and most of them will respond positively to us, the teachers. When this happens, over and over again, we start developing relationships, we may high five students in the corridor or school duties. We may start having short conversations with our students about their weekend, their holidays; they may start opening up to us. The trust status quo has been stablished. However, if wrong choices are made in the classroom, especially in a setting with 30 students or more, our behaviour management policy must always be adopted. This is what I mean about the two sides of the coin: 

High expectations + excellent teaching and learning strategies, on one side, and behaviour management skills + fairness, on the other side.

So, coming back to the viral video of a headteacher high fiving students. It is absolutely fine! However, let's not be naïve, high fiving students is the result of a skilful approach to learning and behaviour management, not to be taken for granted, neither to be simplified.